Shah Rukh Khan’s ambitious sci-fi thriller Ra.One, directed by Anubhav Sinha, left critics and viewers divided. The film took the baton of special effects forward for Hindi cinema but suffered heavily in terms of story and script. Regardless, thanks to a defiant publicity campaign that seeped into every nook and corner of the film-viewing junta, Ra.One registered impressive box office collections, marching into the coveted 100 crore club. So when a film does good business, regardless of its merits, producers are naturally inclined to think in terms of sequels, stretching the concept forward for as long as money can be made off the audience’s interest.
If the news currently doing the rounds is to be believed, then Khan and team are thinking sequels too, hoping to cash in on the hype. However, Khan insists he will do so only if the right idea came along. With the original film borrowing heavily from the pantheon of Hollywood sci-fi (Terminator, Tron, Spiderman etc), we figured the sequel too would go a similar way. So to help Mr. Khan and his creative team as they brainstorm sequel ideas, we at The NRI conjured up our own suggestions for the sequel.
The possibilities of an aptly “inspired” sequel, we realized, are endless:
SRK returns in the form of Ra.2-G.2 - a short, stumpy robot with a multiple personality disorder, who can only communicate via whirs and bleeps. He teams up with his camp best friend, a shiny golden telephone receiver of the name ST-D-ISD. Together, they head out to deliver an important message to a powerful Jedi called Gobi-Naan Kenobi before the evil emperor Darth Gabbar finds them.
Tagline – Gabbar Sith Aa Jayega / Kitne Trooper Thay?
Influences – Star Wars, Sholay
Though destroyed at the end of the last film, Ra-One has found a way to resurrect, becoming more powerful than ever when he decides to take over the internet. Posing through fake Facebook and Twitter profiles, he creates havoc between families, friends, work colleagues and lovers through spreading gossip and lies. Could G-One be ‘the chosen one’ to save mankind before they kill themselves?
Tagline – They took his life. He took the Internet.
Influences – The Matrix
As a secret identity, G-One begins to work as a chef at a local restaurant. Unfortunately, his robot brain cannot comprehend the complexity of human taste buds and he is at the brink of getting fired. That is, until he begins an unlikely friendship with a slow-talking, monotonous rat, whose extraordinary cooking skills help him further his career. Soon he is asked to cook at the G8 peace summit, but will he realize that his helpful rat guide is a reincarnation of Ra-One before he is tricked into poisoning the world leaders at the summit?
Tagline – Squeak. Squeak. Squeak. Boom.
Influences – Ratatouille, Duplicate
G-One Ek Sangharsh Hain
G-One grows a moustache and suddenly begins to think that he is Anil Kapoor, flailing dance moves and grand gestures included. Meanwhile, Mogambo has brought Ra-One back from the dead and teamed up with him in order to annihilate the world. Though Lucifer wants to cure G-One, he realizes that the only way to save the world is to allow his protector to become Mr India, and battle Mogambo to the death.
Tagline – 1 2 ka 4. 4 2 ka 1. My Name is G-One.
Influences – Mr India, Jeevan Ek Sangharsh
Down on his money, Lucifer finds a business opportunity in entering G-One in a robot-boxing match. Getting him trained by retired boxer Amir Khan, G-One works his way up the tournament to go head to head with an opponent he doesn’t expect – his old enemy, Ra-One.
Tagline – Get ready to Ra.Mble
Influences – Real Steel
G-One watches helplessly as Lucifer’s mother gets married to a successful businessman (Salman Khan cameo). But it’s not over, as Lucifer hatches a plan for G-One to win her back, by creating a female robot girlfriend for him (Priyanka Chopra, naturally), making her jealous. As they begin to win over Lucifer’s mother, they are oblivious that the female robot they have created from the remains of Ra-One, also contains a part of his soul, slowly waking to life.
Tagline – Women are dangerous. Mechanical women even more so.
Influences – Weird Science
Ra-dha Kaise Na Jala
When teenager Lucifer grows hormones and discovers a new computer game, with a voluptuous female action hero called Ra-Dha (Bipasha Basu? Angelina Jolie?), his friendship with G-One is threatened. But G-One has the sensibility to stay with Lucifer through thick and thin. However, Ra-Dha’s jealousy is piqued to such an extent that she escapes out of the game to kill G-One so that she can have Lucifer all to herself – once and for all.
Tagline – Bro-bots before hoe-bots.
Influences – Toy Story, Fatal Attraction, Terminator 3
With the absence of Ra-One, G-One decides to go into politics under the corrupt tutelage of George Clooney who now wants to stand for India’s next president against Rajnikant. G-One is unable to cope - his inability to lie and deceive, being against his good-natured programming, leads him down a path towards self-destruction. Literally. Indian politics is a game too dangerous for him.
Tagline – System Corrupted. Shut Down Is In Process.
Influences – Rajneeti, The Ides Of March
Power Yoga With G-One
No plot. No action. No villain but your own belly. Find the pounds fall off of you as you follow the robotic pelvic movements of G-One to a slim, size zero. It would be criminal to miss it.
Tagline – Challo Chammak! Fast! Faster!
Influences – Honey Kalaria’s Bhangra Workout
G Maar Kunder
One day G-One wakes up with only one goal – he must slap Bollywood filmmaker Shirish Kunder. Can Lucifer track him and stop him before he slaps every Shirish Kunder in the phone directory?
Tagline – How Can G Slap?
Influences – The Terminator
When things finally work out romantically with Lucifer’s mother, G-One must battle with his greatest opponent yet – ladies underwea…
Okay, that will do. Which one do you think would make the best sequel? Better yet, share with us your suggestions in the comments section below.